When Your Son Punches the Dentist

I have hesitated in writing on a particular incident that happened last month due to my continued state of shock and mortification.  However, so as to remind my readers that we are all sinners (thumbs pointed inward and tapping chest) and that we produce beautiful blessings who are sinners from conception, I feel my honesty and hindsight on the "situation" will prove beneficial and keep me humble.
Blah, blah, blah, moving on. So, my son hates the dentist.  I can't say I blame him.  The mere reminder that an appointment is in the near future sends him on a downward spiral of complete emotional breakdown.  Ethan is 5 1/2.  Ethan still sucks on his fingers.  We have tried many things to get him to stop but alas, they have all proven futile. The dentist informed me that Ethan has loose teeth that will come out soon (yeah, milestone!).  He fears that if Ethan continues to suck on his fingers he will ruin his permanent teeth so he recommended getting a brace placed in his mouth to stop the finger sucking.  It's 100% successful.
Knowing my son's fear of the dentist, I decided to "prep" him.  We had the following conversation on the way to the dentist:
Me: Ethan, sometimes I feel sorry for the dentist.
Ethan: Why?
Me: Because all he wants to do is help kids have good, clean teeth and all he gets is screaming and crying all day and I just feel bad for him (a good dose of manipulation coupled with thinking outside oneself).
Ethan: Well, I don't hate the dentist.  I just hate going to the dentist (Successful separation!)
Me: Yeah, I understand that.  But it's just one of those things we have to do in life (I will spare you the part of the conversation where I thought it wise to explain to my son how adults have to do taxes, only to be bombarded with the "why" bomb 7,200 times).
Ethan: Mom, you know when I was crying in the dentist chair last week?
Me: Yeah
Ethan: Did you feel bad for me?
Me: Yes, of course.
Ethan:  Who did you feel badder for, me or the dentist? (BACKFIRE! Darn kids too smart for his own good)
Me: Well, you of course.  You're my son.  Listen, let's get through this today and mommy will by you an ice-cream cone from McDonald's afterward (and to top it off, a little bribery).
Fast-forward to the dentist office.  Ethan is sitting in the corner of the room refusing to get on the dentist chair.  I use my "Love and Logic" skills (great book) and give him a choice, "Ethan, you can get in the chair all by yourself or I can help you."  He slowly moves toward the chair and climbs up on it.  The assistance give me three cheers for good parenting and I too give myself a pat on the back.  The dentist enters the room and starts to look in Ethan's mouth.  Ethan starts to resist and things are getting harder.  "Ethan, this is making everything take a really long time and I don't like to see you suffer.  If you let the dentist do his job and you sit there quietly, we can get out of here quicker.  So, do you want to sit there for a long time or a little bit?"  Ethan quiets down and the dentist gives me his nod of approval.  I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty much feeling like mom of the year at this point.  Dentist and assistant are impressed by my mad skills and son seems to be reluctantly complying.  Pride cometh before the fall...
It was time for the spacers.  I tried and tried to use my newly acquired parenting skills on Ethan but a funny thing about fear, when someone is truly fearful that another is about to harm them, they throw logic out the window.  I was left with no choice but to hold Ethan down.  He screamed bloody murder and fought me with all his strength (seriously, the boy is strong).  The dentist took a break in between teeth and I wanted to give Ethan a break too.  "Ethan, I'm going to let you go, okay?"  He nodded in agreement.  I slowly released him.  He sat up quickly, turned toward the dentist and socked him right in the gut.  Yep, you heard it right, my son punched the dentist.  There are certain times in life as a parent when you are quick to react and you don't care who is watching you.  Like when your child is running toward the street and you let out one of those crazy mama war cries that scares the life out of your kid and all bystanders.  This was one of those moments.  I grabbed Ethan by the mouth (I think I actually picked him up by the mouth) and moved his face to my face so that we were eye to eye and said in my most stern of mommy voices, "You do NOT punch the dentist!"  I think he got the message.  Needless to say, we did not go to McDonald's.  Lots of lessons learned that day for momma and boy.  Yep, lots of lessons learned.